Sometimes you need a friend…

5 11 2012

Life in the NICU is rough. Its rough for the babies obviously, but its also rough for the mommies or whoever the primary caregiver is. I mean, the mommy spends hopefully 9 months carrying the little one inside. Her entire life and time is spent growing this little person. So when they come out before they were expected, the mommy has to find herself again. Its rough. No one can understand what the mommy of a preemie feels unless you have one yourself. Not even the daddy. I mean in most cases the daddy lived as a spectator for the pregnancy being there, but not as involved completely as the mommy. No offense daddies. Its just not the same.

So once the baby comes and the daddy is back to work, the mommy has to rely on someone to take their minds off their troubles (or hormone!!!). This is the job of the best friend. I am so thankful to have my best friend who can help me deal with my postpartum depression/hormonal changes/whatever you want to call it. He listens to me cry, but unlike the daddy does not take my emotions personally. The daddy should’t either but, its your partner….sometimes you take their sadness personally especially when you can’t ‘fix’ them.

So, this one is for all the best friends. Thank you for being you and thank you for always being there.





Just take the bottle!

4 11 2012

Alondra Jade came into this world 8 weeks early. Not by her choice, but because my preeclampsia was getting too dangerous for the both of us. So, the doctors evicted her. Poor baby. But now she is back to her own schedule, doing things when she wants too. Which means not drinking from a bottle. Everyone asks when she gets to go come and the answer is always the same..,when she can take all of her feedings by bottle. Nurses are very quick to say “Remember she isn’t even supposed to be here yet.” Thanks, didn’t you read my last post? She doesn’t like the bottle. She wants to be a breastfed baby only. Stop confusing her. I can’t stand making her cry when she is force to take a bottle when she wants Mommy. I will just quit my job to stay home to be her personal cow for the next year. Sorry Mario, you better start bringing in the big bucks!





Motherhood

2 11 2012

The orange band. Only one place in the hospital brands parents in such a way. Actually no that is not true. The labor and delivery ward gives parents thin clear bands to link them with their newborn babies. The orange band is for the NICU. The Newborn Intensive Care Unit. It grants exclusive access to parents to their children in this unit. To me, it is my scarlet letter. It tells the world my baby was not ready to be born. To me, it tells the world I failed as a mother and as a woman. I couldn’t keep my baby inside until she was ready to be born. I hate this orange band, but without it I cannot see my angel who I worked so hard ¬†for.